I sit here before work contemplating my soul and its sorry state of being.
When all you want is love, all you get is used.
Author Archives: boomdeeay
Lies
I am a liar. I tell people I am happy. I tell people life is great. I tell people what they want to hear because when I do not they get upset.
The truth is pain filled and raw.
Avoricious
A night filled with Cuffs & Buttons on ice
And cherries
More cherries for his delight
There was malt and the yeast
A brewer’s first find
Muddling the fruit
Muddling the mind
Hands moving freely
Stirring
Crafting; heavy breathing
Fulfilling a need
Fermented mandarins and clingstone red beauties
Tart cranberry red lips
A soft kiss melted reason
Opening eyes
Waking Concupiscence
With hot liquid flame
The rasp of whiskers on flesh
Skin seeking skin
Building fire burning within
Kisses north, kisses south
Desire being driven solely by mouth
Quivering thighs
Soft moans and sighs
Fingers drawing rhumb lines
From apex to breast
Steering straight
In a spiral
Trough a beautiful storm
Left breathless and legless
Resting safe on his shores…
Everything changes
All falls apart
Another soft kiss
And I’m left
Left languid and happy not realizing
He’s taken my heart
Key Lime Pie or the type of man I’m looking for…
There is something decidedly perfect about the balanced flavors of a good key lime pie from the zesty zingy bite of the filling, the crunch of the crust and the sweet delight of the whipped cream topping. It makes my heart sing. It is exotic, refreshing and satisfying like no other type of pie. Temptation has no stronger pull and finishes off so completely that there’s never a question of my satisfaction.
I have standards, and a list of ideals and wants but as my teeth sink into bite after bite of this magnificent dessert I realize I am looking for a man who embodies the experience of Key Lime Pie. He should be a bit crusty on the outside, just enough grumble and grouch but once you get through the sweet, tart full bodied explosion of life comes through and is accentuated by just enough soft fluffy bliss that any and everything else pales in comparison to such a finely crafted soul.
Now… to find him. 
Self Confidence
My whole life I have been beaten to the ground both figuratively and literally and each time I rise, sometimes a little slower than others but I rise. The only thing left inside is the rebellious Fuck You to those who think they’ve bested me.
Fuck you to the teachers and professors who passed judgement. Fuck you to those whose jealousies prevented me from soaring to those friends who’d rather tie my laces together and laugh as I stumble and fall. Fuck you to those who wanted to see me hated. Fuck you and fuck you again to the people who threw me under bus after bus with knives sticking out of my back.
Anger keeps me rolling forward. I’m too tired without that fuel.
Dreams
Fingerprints on lenses soften harsh red lines that mix with strands of hair whose wisps curl in front of tired eyes.
The glare of light on white paper, blinds
Building points of pain behind the nerves, in the depths of my brain.
In those moments I close my eyes
The pain recedes
Clarity of escape forms in snippets of fantasy so often viewed it’s edges are tatty from wear.
A soft echo of music, the fragrance of flowers in the air, a sonorous voice pontificating as I lean back enveloped by Miss Doolittle’s enormous chair.
I’ve never stayed so long as to see the face of the man who’ll take good care of me, but I suppose somethings aren’t quite meant to be.
The Usual Wait
They are talking quietly downstairs, the words I cannot hear.
The wind moves in winding fashion through the naked boughs of my myrtle trees.
Geese moving across the sky in this darkness make an odd and muted cry.
The waitress next door sits in her car, the engine idling in laborious fashion, she will go in after awhile.
My mind is busy thinking of things that will never happen while I wait for sleep’s arrival.
Frosty Kiss Goodnight
So frozen is this northern Clime
Night’s ceiling dark and endlessly high
Stars with their pale pale light
Shine infinitely while we’re spinning
The warmth of my breath as it whispers
A prayer hangs brittle in the frost
The crystals form beautiful, serene
Whisked away by a Mistral to Persephone
By chance or design she takes pity on my plea
And I know my heart is not lost. 
Morning
Oh this dark, sunless hour of inconvenient activity.
taranormalactivity 